Your guide to bangin’ hangouts at on-campus
It’s Wednesday evening.
Class ended early today, and you’ve spent the hours since then quenching your thirst with mugs at Mug’s. You’ve also been eyeing the hottie across the bar (don’t listen to the discouraging whispers of your friends — they’re just jealous of your success and unstoppable sex appeal) and it’s just about time to move this party elsewhere.
But you’re at BCIT! Where can you find a quiet corner for some good, old-fashioned lovemaking on campus?
Get access
If you’re in a rush and looking for the closest option, the wheelchair-accessible bathrooms scattered across campus are probably the easiest place to get it on. They include locking doors and single stalls to ensure a modicum of privacy, handrails to support yourself, sinks for easy clean-up, and a mirror so you can watch yourself in action.
On the downside, there’s a toilet in the room. Nothing kills the mood like bursting into a bathroom to find a day-old dookie floating in the porcelain bowl.
Work it
Looking for something a little riskier? Most programs have workrooms somewhere on campus, and these secluded corners can be found empty if the timing is right. However, they rarely have doors, so be prepared for intrusion by studious individuals.
Putting the broad in broadcasting
The broadcast building is full of little nooks and crannies to exploit, including a number of dark, secluded practice booths. You’re likely to find the booths abandoned most evenings after class, giving you an opportunity to podcast your baby-making. Careful, though: word is the practice studios broadcast live to instructors’ offices.
Hit (it at) the gym
Sex can be a great workout, so why not take your impromptu trysts to BCIT’s gym? SE16 contains a number of individual use showers, not to mention change rooms with multiple showers, benches, and locking doors. Take a turn in each of the showers, but be careful as you’re leaving — the adjacent hallway is long and exposed, so leaving the room together might arouse suspicion.
Keep it quiet
While the library’s requirement for silence might cramp your style, if you’re careful (and quick!) you can squeeze in a little fun between the stacks. The musty bookshelves provide good visual cover, and you just might find some trashy romantic fiction sandwiched between copies of The Zen of Empirical Research.
(Porn) starry night
Finally, if you’re a hopeless romantic, treat your date to a wild night beneath the stars. While it might seem counter-intuitive to head underground, check out BCIT’s little-known planetarium, hidden in the lower levels of SW3. It’s dark, usually empty, the seats are padded, and there are, of course, stars overhead. If you’re a techie, you might even be able to play your favourite porno through the super-expensive Spitz A3P Projector.
While none of these spots adequately replace an old-fashioned bed, adventurous fornicators will find plenty of places to bang at our favourite technical institution. Just don’t get caught with your pants down!
NOTE: The Link does not nessessarily support sex on campus… but hey, you’re adults.[hr]
