difficult woman

i am a difficult woman, gladly.
many of us weren’t wanted
when the ultrasounds at the gynac’s read – FEMALE
many of our parents had to shield us throughout our lives, by restricting us from being truly free
but our parents, they don’t succeed cuz our society’s restrictions
make it impossible to build that wall
many of us are given away
at the first opportunity
we were
labelled as the burdens they didn’t need, didn’t want…
so many of us molded by society,
by our families,
to grow up thinking that we are here to serve another family
and for the ones who weren’t molded
into what society wants,
those whose parents were able to create a high enough wall, fall prey to
colleagues; mentors,
the systems; constitutions and
the law,
fall prey to
regressive systemic values
regardless of our sizes, we jump
as high as the hurdles require us to… cuz we’ve built endurance, stamina, strength to fight…
to power through it all
the average me may be smaller
but the resilience we carry surmounts all beings,
the average me may be

restricted from many
but when given the tools we
fend for ourselves and
for all of you too,
when given the knowledge we
make valuable changes in our worlds, and yours…
yet our ideals and philosophies are ignored
giving life is merely a small
miracle that some of us may
easily manifest,
but remember it is a gift,
one that we should be able to choose to use, or not to…
but if we chose anything other than that, we’re incompetent
if we walk a road that isn’t what society built, we are burdens
if we question the illiberal ways
we are difficult
but I say so proudly
and loudly,
that I’m here to be difficult,
cuz if living on my own terms as the woman i truly want to be,
is at the expense of your comfort,
then I’m here to be difficult,
i’m here to make you uncomfortable, gladly.


Poem by: Aastha Pandey